In defense of Rahul, Trump

*If this blog post was a human being, that title would be a chic magnet*

Here’s the deal, I am not a fan of either Rahul (Gandhi, not Dravid. Dravid is so awesome. You should really be butchered if you call Dravid, Rahul) or Trump. But that doesn’t mean I cannot make a compelling case for them.

It was recently that I was at an open mic (the place where comedians go to be funny) and I heard a friend of mine speak in defense of Rahul. Here’s the funny part, for the first few minutes he  just had to sell the idea that Rahul might be forced in to politics and would be no different from Sachin Tendulkar if his father had forced him to become a playback singer. (3 Idiots reference. SEO BITCHES).

Sadly, the crowd did not find the supporting Rahul propaganda funny. They were upset. I glanced them for khaki shorts, but didn’t find any. Who knew that someone could be a Sanghi in a closet!

Now, to why I defend them (The foreplay is over). It isn’t because I think they are smart or because I agree with their ridiculous arguments. Rather, the support comes from the fact that these guys have become the punching bags of the society. They are what we call ‘cheap laughs’. Because people will laugh at them no matter what the premise of the joke is.

And you know the worse part, most people who laugh at them have no fucken idea why they are laughing. They laugh because they think it is cool.

Generally the people who laugh the hardest at these jokes are these Agarwals, Jains and the over enthusiastic Gujjus who have had at least 4 large pegs of bull sperm (FYI: that’s what goes into Redbull and gives you wings).

It is funny because a person who thinks wearing a pink shirt with a silver flower on it is okay is judging Rahul and Trump, who at least have made it to a stage where an entire nation comes together to criticize them. The irony.

These guys use Rahul as a cue to laugh and become cool. To make matters worse, none of these assholes know what Rahul and Trump are being criticized for. Fuck, that is too far-fetched, show these guys any random white guy in a suit and tell them it is Trump’s new picture and they’ll believe you.

It is these useless people that social media has given a voice to. If Hitler knew these people existed, he’d pardon the Jews and come after them. The allied forces would also join hands with Hitler and make the world a peaceful place.

Social media has given a voice to people who don’t deserve one. I know that as I make this proud declaration, some dude reading this blog would put me in that category. But hey, Article 19. Deal with it.


When little things make you nostalgic

I am sure that it might sound foolish to most of you’ll, but a chewing gum left me thinking about my childhood for a long time. Yes, that’s right, a chewing gum. And its no ordinary chewing gum. It is BOOMER!!

As a kid, I remember buying so many of these just to get the free tattoo. And every time i put it on, i would get trashed! :p Yes, the best blogger in the world was also trashed by his parents! 😀

Remember this?? :D
Remember this?? 😀

Today, after dinner at office, just went down to a store nearby to get a chewing gum. I was expecting to get a stupid Centrefresh that is abnormally sweet. But then i noticed that the shop had boomer, yes a boomer! it was the first time i was seeing a boomer in years. I know it is too melodramatic but yes, it invoked so many emotions in me! Never thought a chewing gum could send me ten years back.

Without much ado, i bought it. The paper cover, that rectangular shape, the pinkish-white colour of the gum (which our teachers told us was made out of pig skin) sent me into a different world. The taste of the boomer, hasn’t changed a bit.

They say little things in life, that you barely remember, end up being your fond memories. It is great how a little boomer could remind me of my childhood. The good old days when i weighed over a 100 kgs and ran around the streets playing cricket! I know the thought itself is funny but never mind, that’s my childhood! 😀